Dude! Rough!
by Sami-SDGForce
Summary: When Rattrap 'c-s 'dat Prowl & Bumblebee r act-n' strange, he wants 2 know why. But what he finds is someth-n' he didn't 'c c'm-n'. Also, he wrote a diary 'bout it, & 'dis is it. Sl-ght AU. Prowl/fem!Bee. Set dur-n' my fic: "Spark 2 Spark".


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Disclaimer: I don't own Transformers: Animated, the show, the characters, etc; nor do I own some of the characters in this fanfic. But, I do own other characters that you'll find in this fanfic.

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_**"Dude?! Rough?!"**_ --

_**"Rattrap's POV on Prowl & Bumblebee's Upcoming Suprise." **_

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Pt. 01. -- "The Accident."

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"Aww, 'da sights & 'da smells of the city." I said as I sighed happily while diggin' through 'da trash. "One more thin' I lllllooooovvvvveeeee 'bout bein' a rat."

_It just takes a little bit of this, a little bit of that;  
It started with a kiss, now we're up to bat;  
A little bit of laughs, a little bit of pain;  
I'm tellin' you, my babe, it's all in the game of love._

"Oh, man, gimme a break, for pete's sakes?!" I said, climbin' up to 'da rooftop; & what do I find -- Little Ms. Birdlady playin' music on 'er com-link! "Airazor! 'Need I ask -- why're youse playin' your music on some rooftop alone, & not with 'Da Fearless Leader' right now?"

"Shut up, Rattrap." she said, changin' into her 'Bald Eagle-mode' & then she started thashin' 'round like 'er tail-feathers were on fire. "Stupid Horn Brothers! Why couldn't they leave us alone!? Why!?"

"It's 'dat bad, is it?! What'd they do ta make ya go & act so...feral!?"

* * *

"Optimus has trying to ask me something for weeks, & when I'm so close to finding out what that is, they ruined things by dumping a mixture of cherry limeade, pink paint, & sawdust on top of him."

"Eww! Now, 'dat's bad?!" I'd never been so grossed since Scourge put yams & root beer down in my pants. Lil' brat brother of mine?!

"Tell me about it?! It spilled all over his head & back!"

"Why his head & back!?"

"Well, he...sorta of...got down on one knee. Put his hands on the one that was still up too?!"

_'Oh, man!'_ I thought ta myself, puttin' my hands on my face while doin' so. _**'Big-boy-in-red-&-blue'** wanted ta pop 'da question ta Squawks!'_

_Squeak!_

_Screech!_

* * *

"Big-boss?!"

"No, Optimus should still be cleaning off that mixture I told 'bout, he'd sent someone else." we leaned over 'da edge of 'da rooftop ta a couple of certain 'ellow & back pals of ours. "Bumblebee & Prowl?!" 'Birdlady said as the lil' pigtailed crush of my 10-year old brother Scurry, ('dat's Scourge's lil' nickname), stepped out of Bumblebee's 'vehi-mode.

"& Sari-drabby too?!" I joke 'round, only ta slugged in 'da head with a flower pot by Fly-girl. "OUCH!! IT WAS JUST A JOKE, YA FEM-BOT?!"

"SSSSSQQQQQUUUUUAAAAAWWWWWKKKKK!!" youse can only guess what happens next.

"AAAAAHHHHH!!"

_Zoom!_

_Boom!_

* * *

"There was not funny one bit!"

"Sorry, my bad?!"

"Urg, oh, come on, Bumblebee?! It's just a little wall?!" I could 'da speedster gruntin' & complainin' ta 'imself as he make it up the buildin', carrying Sari & followed by Ol' Ninja-bot. "Uh, hi?! 'Mind if we join you!?"

"Not at all?!..." Airazor said, eyein' my tail with a 'I'm-gonna-hurt-youse' look, when a buzzin' sound filled the air. "...But we'll have to do something about the bug problem! No offense, Bumblebee?!"

"Oh, Goody! Waspinator find Bird-bot, blast Bird-bot, get big reward from Tarantulas." Igor 'da Hornet said, aimin' some brown & purple ray-gun at 'da Birdlady's Spark-Chamber. "Now, Bird-bot hold still."

"Mother of Cold Drops?!"

"AIRAZOR, LOOK OUT!" Bumblebee screamed, shovin' Tail-feathers outta the way at the last sec', but he got hit by 'da green, & he started glowin' bluish-green, & he was shakin' & screamin' the whole time, & then, he just fell over. 'Good thin' Sari was standin' next ta Prowl 'da whole time.

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"BUMBLEBEE?!" Prowl shouted as he & 'da Lil' Missy were at 'Bee's side in 2 shakes of a lamb's tail.

"Oh, man! We're all gonna die."

"Shut up, Rattrap?!"

"Oh! Waspinator didn't want to hit Bug-like Car-bot. Waspinator want to hit Bird-bot! Tarantulas will be very unhappy."

"You've just made a big mistake!" the Ninja-bot said as he tossed one of 'is star-darts at 'da Bug, which flew right behind 'da Lil' Stringer.

"Heh ha! Ninja-bot miss, not hit Waspinator."

"Do not be so sure, it is not like I was aiming for your front?!"

"Huh?" I suddenly know what was Prowl's idea. "Uh, Scurry?! Sari?! 'Best ta cover y our eyes?! This ain't gonna be pretty."

_Wooosh!_

_Crack!_

_Sizz!_

_Boom!_

"Aaaaahhhhh!!"

"Whoa! I hope he's sent all the way of City lines."

"Uh, guys...& Sari?! Aren't you forgetten something?!"

"Bumblebee?!"

"Sheesh, man Birdlady?! Youse really know how ta brin' up a kill-joy."

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Much later...

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After bringin' Speedy ta Ratch', he did some tests, but he said a month ta get 'da results. & don't worry, Bumblebee'll live, 'danks ta Ratchet, Airazor, & Sari.

"So, uh, Prowl?! Why'd 'dat lil' incident back 'dere get ya so pissed off!?"

"I...uh...I..."

"Scurry?! Will you stand still for one second & let me talk to you!?" Sari said, musta been chasing my lil' bro', who was, once again, bein' shy ta talk ta 'er.

"No thanks!" he yelped, as ran down the hall. However, he didn't see my tail, meanin' 'dat he musta stepped on it.

"Aaaaahhhhh!!" I screamed, fallin' over on 'da floor in 'da worst pain. "Prowl! You're lucky my baby bro' just stepped on my tail, or I wouldn't be callin' a rain-check on our lil' chat for a month from now, O.K.?!"

"O.K.?!"

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Pt. 02. -- "Month No. #01."

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"Squawks?!"

"Rattrap?! Unless you have a very good reason...for waking up me...at 3:00 A.M. Leave, now?!"

"It's nothin' -- 'just wanta remind ta keep a eye on Prowl & Bumblebee when they're together & let me know if they go & do anythin' strange?!"

"Like what?!"

"Like somethin' they normally wouldn't do when they're together?!"

"Rattrap?! It's not like they slept together?!" Birdlady replied as she popped 'er outta of 'er bird's-nest-/-hammock of a recharge berth. "Besides, Bumblebee's sick."

"Yeah, I know. But, how'd Bumblebee get sick, 'dat's what I'm askin', youse dig?! I maen, he's been 'dat way for 'bout a month now, after all"

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"But...that's impossible?! They...they're both--" she then gave me 'da evil eye'. "If you had any of self-preservation at all, you'll be gone in the next 10 seconds."

"I'm gone!"

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&

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Meanwhile, elsewhere...

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"Arrrr! 'Dat fem-bot can drive some 'bots crazy sometimes." I said ta myself as I was returnin' ta my room, 'dat is, 'fore I was jumped by Tweedle-dee & Tweedle-dum.

"Rattrap!"

"Crikey! Thank goodness, we found you, mate?!"

"What's the meanin' of 'dis?"

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"It's Airazor!"

"She's forgotton us, dude!"

"What are youse talkin' 'bout!?"

"She spends more time with Optimus than she does with us, man?!"

"Oh man?!" I said ta 'yself as I began laughing so hard, I thought I'd bust a gut. "There's no way she forget youse two! After all, 'da 3 of ya have know each other since youse were kids, right?!"

"But--"

"But nothin'?! Look?!" I 'den pointed at Tweedle-dee. "Rhinox!" & then, I pointed at his twin bro'. "Backstop!" I said as I gave 'em 'da Ol' Aimin'-Gunner's Eye'. "Now, 'da two of ya have know 'Tail-feathers' longer than anybody who so much as sets foot on 'dis here base -- past, present, &/or future-wise. So even if 'da Birdlady & 'da Boss-Mobile get hitched, settle down, & she gives 'im a army of lil' kiddies for 'im & her ta call their own, you're still gonna her pals. But, not if 'da two of ya'll ruin 'dat if youse keep messin' with their relationship, trust me ta my tail when I say 'dis, O.K. now?!"

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"O.K.?!"

"Now run along 'fore all 3 of us get in trouble." I said as I watch 'em get back ta their rooms. "Oh boy?! Those two've got more problems 'dan I do."

Now, as I was walkin' back ta my room, I 'dan heard some voices in 'da Prowler's room. "Yes, that's it. Yess, oh yess!"

"What 'da--"

"Stop?! Please stop?!"

"Oh my?! 'Dat sounded like Bumbles!" I said ta myself as I freaked & ran ta 'da door, banging. "Prowl?! OPEN...'DIS...DOOR...NOW?!"

After half a hour or so, he opened 'da door. "What you want, Rattrap?!"

"What was 'dat all 'bout!?"

* * *

"I do not follow?!"

"Don't gimme 'dat, Prowl?! I heard Speedy sayin' 'Stop?! Please stop?!', he sounded upset?!" I said as I went inta 'is room. "What's goin'-- oh, my?!" what I then saw really shook me.

"Rattrap?! Oh dear?!"

"I tried to stop him."

"Oh, boy?! Youse were goin' over 'da Birds & 'da Bees with Speedy?!" I joked as I look at the unhappy yellow bot who was now half-way de-armored. "Heh, no offense."

"Rattrap?! Please-- "

"Don't worry?! I seldomly vow on my tail not ta tell a single soul 'bout 'dis. Your secret's safe with me." & wid' 'dat, I started headin' for 'da door. "Now, I'm gonna just leave youse two ta your lil' love fest."

"I do not know how I am to thank, Rattrap?!"

"Look?! 'Just don't go sayin' anythin' 'bout 'dis, O.K.?! 'Not even ta Airazor?! Squawks'd never let me live 'dis down if she find out 'bout me keepin' my 'trap shut for once, since it's not for me."

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Pt. 03. -- "Month No. #02."

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It was a month since I'd found out _'Prowl & Bumblebee's lil' secret,'_ I was just kickin' back. 'Dat is, 'til Bulky came in with 'is lil'-uns.

"Hey there, Rattrap?!"

"Uh...'morning, Bulkhead?!"

"Check this out?!" he said with a smile & a 'you'll-not-gonna-believe-what-I've-got-ta-show-you' look on his face. "O.K., Mudflap?! There's Rattrap; can you say 'Rattrap'!?" he said ta 'da lil' guy, only ta get a blank stare.

"Oh, 'dat's really somethin', Bulkhead."

"I was so sure I heard him talk this morning."

"Huh? 'Musta been a bird?!"

"As if?!" Bulkhead replied, bushin' me off as he missed lil' Mudflap ran behind me & outta 'is sight. "Mudflap?!"

"Ouch!" 'da lil'-uns grabbed my tail & bit it -- again. "Why does 'dis keep happenin' ta me?"

* * *

"Maybe the little guy just likes you?!"

"Oh, yeah. Sure!" I said, pullin' my outta 'da lil'-uns' mouth, & 'dat's when he looked at me. "What're youse lookin' at?"

"Wattwap?!" I 'den got a crushin' hug after 'dat. "Wattwap!"

"Mudflap! Yo-you-you're talking! I knew it! I knew you could do it!"

"So, he said his 1st words 'dis mornin'?! What were 'dey?"

"First, it was: 'Whwe's Auntie Aiwazow?', & then, it was-- it was-- 'Whewe's Mama?'. " Bulky hung 'is head as he choked on 'is words. "I still can't believe it's been a couple of months since it happened."

"I know ya still miss Transmutate, but she'd want youse ta be happy."

"I know, but it's hard, & Mudflap doesn't really help."

"Well, whadda ya expect?! He's justa a sparklin'! One who needs 'is Pops now more 'den ever, trust me on my tail when I say 'dis, youse see?!" I replied as I got bit once more. "Ouch! 'Dis thin' likes ta nibble!"

* * *

"RATTRAP?!"

"Here, youse hold 'im?! I gotta go see what Squawks wants."

"Say 'Bye, bye, Rattrap!', Mupflap?!"

"Bye, bye, Wattwap!"

"Aww! 'Atta boy?! Wait 'til Ratchet & Boss-bot get a load of this?!"

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&

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Meanwhile, once wid' Airazor...

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"Uh...'youse screeched, Birdlady?!"

"Where is it?"

"I've got no idea what youse're talkin' 'bout?!"

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"Tell me what you did with my sticker book, & just maybe, I'll go easy on you."

"I ain't done nothin' ta your precious sticker book, O.K.?!"

"Why you little-- ?!" Squawks growled as she prepared ta slug me, but missed & hit Bumbles, who was passin' 'drough the hall on 'is way ta 'da Dr. Hatchet, in 'da gut. "BUMBLEBEE?!"

"Ooooohhhhh!!" Mr.-Speedy-Gonzales-Wantabe groan as he gripped 'is side in pain. "Ouch, ouch, ouch?! It hurts!"

"Are you O.K.? I didn't mean to-- I'm sorry!"

"What've I done?"

"You?! I'm the one that spucker-punched Bumblbee."

"Yep, but I coulda told ya 'dat..."

"...You didn't take my sticker book?!" Tailfeathers said wid' a sigh. "I know that now."

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Much later, in Ratchet's lab...

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"When I get my hands on that there ninja-bot, he'll a lot of explainin' ta do!"

"Yo, Doc-bot?! Quit your gramlin' & help us, please?! We've got a problem."

"Whatever it's 'bout, Rattrap, it'd better be good?!"

"How 'bout 'dis?" I said as me & 'da Birdlady showed 'im the damaged speed-bot "Squaws & I've been fightin' -- again. Only 'dis time, Bumbles here got caught in 'da cross-fire -- so ta speak."

"Why, me!? Why, now!?"

"Well, there's something Ratchet probably doesn't want us to answer."

"I need the two of ya ta get goin', so I can work on 'im -- NOW?!"

"We're gone!"

"By 'da way, Mudflap said his 1st words 'dis mornin', but I'll tell 'bout it later."

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Hours later...

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"Listen, Squawks?! I'm sorry 'bout 'fore, I didn't mean ta rattle your cage, so ta speak."

"No, Rattrap. If anyone's got they're sorry, it's gotta be me. I...I falsely accused you of something you clearly didn't do, & Bumblebee eneded getting hurt 'cause I couldn't control myself."

"Well, trust me on my tail when I say I'll cut ya a deal: youse accept my apology, & I'll accept yours, eh, Birdlady?!"

"Heh?! 'Sounds simple enough?! You've got yourself a deal."

"Eh, 'danks, you're welcome, & apology accepted, Tailfeathers."

"Eh?! Same here, Rattrap, same here." she said as we shook hands, claws, talons, paws, paws & claws, whatever, ta seal 'da deal. "So?! Mudflap really said his first words today?!"

"Youse bet!"

"What were they?"

* * *

"Well, 'corin' ta 'is pops, 1st 'dere was 'Whewe's Auntie Aiwazow?', 'den..."

"& 'den, what?!"

"...'den he said: 'Whewe's Mama?', Squawks."

"Oh?!"

"Eh?! 'Ya still blamin' yourself for what happened ta Lil'-Ms.-Shezilla-in-a-Can?!"

"Why didn't I trust her when I'd got the chance, Rattrap?!"

"C'mon, Squawks?! It's not your fault! Besides, no one, not even Rampage, saw Transy fallin' for Bulky & choosin' 'da guy of 'er over 'er partner-in-crime."

"Uh...Rattrap?! About that?! When Transmutate...died, I learn something about her -- she...she was-- "

"PPPPPRRRRROOOOOWWWWWLLLLL?!"

* * *

"Oy, boy?!" I said ta 'yself as I panicked while 'da Prowler rushed on over ta Ol' Dr. Hatchet's lab. "Mr.-Tree-Hugger's in for a dip in hot water when he gets 'dought 'dose doors."

"What's that should to mean?"

"Ya don't wanna know."

"Airazor?!" Ratchet said, pokin' 'is head outta 'da doorway. "I want ya ta Sari over here right way."

"Sure thing!" she replied just 'fore turnin' my way. "Keep me posted, O.K?!" she calmly told me wid' _'Da Wink'_

"Got'cha, Squawks." I said as I waited for Ol' Dr. Hatch' ta squeeze 'is head back 'hind 'dose doors, & 'den, I put my ear on a door.

.:"What is this about, Ratchet?!":.

* * *

.:"See for yourself.":.

.:"Bumblebee?!":.

"Oy, my?!"

.:"What happened?":.

.:"She got caught in the middle of another one of Rattrap & Airazor's feuds.":.

.:"She?!":.

.:"& guess what else?! Y'all got her sparking your creation!":.

.:"WHAT?!":.

"She?! Sparking?! Oy, boy?!"

"She who, Rattrap?!"

"& what did you mean by 'Sparking'?"

"Airazor, you're back?!" I said as I gave Ol' Squawks a happy greeting -- for once. "& ya brought Sari, 'dank goodness!"

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So, while 'da Lil' Missy was helpin' Ol' Dr. Hatchet patch up 'da Queen-bee, I told Squawks 'da whole story. She 'den gave me a blank stare & used 'er 'unbelieveable scream', so, knowin' 'er, she was takin' it pretty well.

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&

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Pt. 04. -- "Month No. #03."

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&

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One month after findin' out 'bout 'da lil'-uns-ta-be, 'din's were pretty much back ta normal, but not quite. 'Da Prowler, alon' wi'd Doc. Hatchet, Squawks, Queeny, & yours-truely, told 'da tru'd. Oy, & Mr. Ninja-bot & Ms. Queen-bee 'dey could get hitched once she had 'da Sparklin', plus, 'dey also figured ta go full term wi'd 'da 'ding.

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End file.
